More than ever before, I'm beginning to see just what tragedy we are experiencing here in the United States due to the lack of "active fathers" in our culture.
Just look around:
Brittany Spears---no mention of her father, ever.
Paris Hilton---again, little, if no mention of her father, ever.
And those are just two of the more notable figures....
But we see this tragedy on a very local and personal scale everywhere.
In my job, I am always talking with young men (and some young women) are who single parents. And most of these folk are still "babies" themselves, by and large. They want the best for their children--at least that's what they tell me. I tend to believe them....at least some of the time.
What really bugs me is the fact that so many children are growing up in a deranged, distorted, and dangerous society where the value of "fathers" is increasingly being scoffed, or worse yet, being ignored.
No child in this country should be forced to grow up (and they will grow up, whether we like it or not) wondering what the value of a "man" really is. These precious children did not come into the world on their own, or with only the help of their mother. God created them a product of both a man and a woman.
Children need both images in their life.
Why am I so concerned about this now?
Because I grew up without a father in my life.
My parents divorced when I was a few weeks old, and then abandoned me. Even though I know them both, I was the victim of their dropping in and out of my life at their convenience. My precious paternal grandmother raised me the best she knew how--and she did a remarkable job, if I must say so myself.
I never knew what a strong, good man was like for a long, long time. I never knew the tenderness of a dad who would teach me how to pitch a ball, or mow a lawn, or any of the other stuff that every "boy" needs. No child (boy or girl) deserves a bully as a dad, but they do deserve a dad.
God has brought me a long way since those days many, many years ago. There have been several great men in my life who continue to demonstrate just what it means to be a "strong, gracious" man of God. These men have become "fathers" to me in ways that only eternity will reveal.
But, as Gordon Dalbey so eloquently states in his Healing the Masculine Soul, we need strong and godly men in this nation. Those strong and godly men are needed in their families.
We can't afford to allow children to raise themselves anymore. And we certainly can't afford to allow "children" to raise children anymore.
What shall we do?
2 comments:
First of all, we need to instill better morals in our youth, and secondly teens nowadays need to realize there is more to being a parent than just the ability to produce a child! Parents need to realize, too, that when they decide to divorce...they are divorcing the spouse and not their children and should still provide financial and emotional support to the child or children of the divorce...Phil, you were fortunate to have a loving grandmother who cared enough to be there for you and to have male figures in your life to look up to...many children nowadays are on their own or may as well be for all the guidance they receive!
One of the things that "hurts" me is that half my class (or thereabouts) don't have a father/male role model in their life and it shows. I wish that more Christian men would reach out to these boys (and girls) who so desperately need strong, caring, kind, Christlike men in their lives.
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