From the pulpit of The Moody Church here in Chicago, Senior Pastor, Erwin Lutzer gives this solemn counsel from the Book of Genesis:
“Tell me the worst thing that can happen.”
The man who was speaking was contemplating divorce in favor of marrying a secretary he had met at work, a woman who had refreshed his spirit and invigorated his latent desires. He was willing to leave his wife and three children, believing he could not say no to this one opportunity for happiness and fulfillment.
Despite all the talk about how we are the kind of people who “think things through” the fact is that you and I are basically driven by our desires. We want to do what we want to do, regardless of whether it is right or rational. To resolve the tension between what we know is right and what we want to do, we willingly deceive ourselves. We tell ourselves lies that we want to believe, and often we actually end up believing our most cherished deceptions.
But lies are lies no matter how beneficial they might be in easing our conscience and helping us live with the decisions we intuitively know are wrong. Nowhere are we more willingly deceived than in matters of sexuality.
The New Testament writer James tells us that we cannot blame God for tempting us, “but each one is tempted when by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed” (1:14). Dragged away by evil desires! What a description of the human heart; what a reminder that evil desires can overtake us, and once we embark on our own path, returning to the starting point becomes well nigh impossible. How easy it is to choose what appears to be the easy path rather than the difficult but right one.
You and I must humbly admit that any one of us could make a single decision that could destroy the rest of our life. So this chapter comes as a warning.
Sexual passions refuse to listen to the demands of rationality; they insist on immediate fulfillment, blotting out thoughts about the consequences. Only the present moment counts. “I wanted to have this relationship and did not care about the cost” a man told me who had ruined his marriage. “I thought it would work out, someway, somehow.” Many who have said they never would must ruefully admit that they have fallen into sexual sin. Passions are more compelling than reason, refusing to heed the warnings along the road.
We are willingly deceived; there are lies we love to believe.
Lie #1: That We Can Control the Consequences of our Disobedience.
The first of the three lies are found in the Garden of Eden. God told Adam and Eve, they should not eat of the fruit of the tree for “when you eat of it, you will surely die.” We don’t know what Eve understood by this warning. She apparently could not grasp what death could mean, since she had nothing in her experience to compare with it. Of this much we can be sure: she had no ability to predict the consequences of her actions. Eve did not know that her sin would trip a series of dominoes that would plunge her offspring into centuries of suffering and endless pain. She did not foresee endless wars, greed and pain, and for millions, an eternal hell. Standing there with her mouth watering for a taste of that luscious fruit, she could have cared less about what tomorrow held.
She did not know that she was sacrificing the permanent on the altar of the immediate. How much better if Eve had decided to obey God’s bare word, without needing further explanations! What if she had submitted her own desires to the commands of the Almighty, convinced that He knew more than she! What if she had trusted that God actually had the best for her in mind! Whether such obedience would have been possible (given the complexities of God’s hidden purposes) is another matter.
What is clear is that you and I are wise to obey Scripture whether or not we understand all the whys and the wherefores. We must never forget that there is a vast gap between the creature and the Creator.
What was the nature of Eve’s deception? She depended on her natural perceptions that distorted reality. She took a finite estimate of the situation, not realizing that her ability to assess the consequences of disobedience was limited. Rather than looking outside herself to God’s special revelation, she looked within and chose to follow the lead of her curiosity. She set in motion a series of events that would end with devastating eternal consequences.
Here is the first lesson that Eve’s experience teaches us about deception: just because you can’t foresee any consequences does not mean there won’t be any! God will not be mocked; unforeseen consequences will boomerang, often arising out of “nowhere.” What the Bible defines as a “great sin” is now “a great act of love” an “act of becoming authentic.” Evil is a good and the good evil.
Lie #2: If it is Beautiful, It Must be Right
We visualize Eve standing before the tree, comparing the warning of God with the promise of the serpent. “When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it” (3:6).
The tree looked good, and it was. Obviously, “in and of itself” the fruit was good, for all that God created was good. In one sense she was right when she saw that the tree was “good.” There was nothing intrinsic in this tree that made it different from other trees.
God had, however, attached a penalty for eating it. Human sight cannot perceive the ultimate realities that lie behind our perceptions. God built in consequences for eating it that were imperceptible to the human eye. To Eve, standing in the lush garden looking at a tree that looked similar to the others, it appeared that God was wrong; His instructions were not for her best interests. God called the tree the “tree of the knowledge of good and evil,” but Eve gave it a different label. She saw it as good for the body (food); it was good for the soul (beautiful in appearance); it was good for the mind (it would make her wise); so she felt free to eat. God called the eating of the tree evil; Eve called it good. She was a better judge of right and wrong than God. She preferred her perceptions to God’s instructions! This forbidden tree was “desirable.” Her desires were more present to her than rational considerations. The passions of the body were given precedent over the needs of the soul. If she didn’t eat of the tree, she would spend the rest of her life wondering what it would have been like to enter into the realm of “the knowledge of good an evil.”
So the serpent, in effect told Eve, “Feel, don’t think!” Eve’s has many daughters. One young woman said that accepted a man’s invitation to go to bed with him, because if she didn’t she would “always wonder what it would have been like.” Curiosity is often the lure that leads us to set aside our better judgment. Sin never comes to us properly labeled: it always appears wrapped in a different package and presented as something other than what it is. The deadly hook is camouflaged with all kinds of appealing delicacies. If we follow our fallen nature we will call evil good and good evil.
Two lesbians, both from Christian families, argued that their relationship was not only loving, but “beautiful.” In fact, they were more certain that their relationship was honoring to God than they were about anything else. They had not yet learned the second bitter lesson Eve learned at such high cost to herself and to the human race: just because something is beautiful does not mean that it is right.
Let me say it again: Even beautiful fruit, if forbidden by God, incurs judgment. There is no use arguing with an adulterer who has finally found someone who understands him, someone with whom there is communication, love and oneness—there is no use arguing about whether the relationship is as beautiful as he says it is. The issue is not whether it is beautiful, but whether it is right; the question is not whether it is fulfilling, but whether God is pleased. It’s not how we feel, but how we obey.
Lies used to justify various improper sexual conducts are legion. Dancers in strip clubs believe the lies of those who come to see them undress. One dancer said that her act was truly “beautiful” and “spiritual.” They tell themselves that the compliments given by men are real, refusing to admit their crude manipulation. They live in a world of pain and abuse and yet try to portray a world of seduction and sexual fulfillment. They tell themselves that because they are beautiful, they have nothing to hide, when in point of fact, they feel degraded and used. No matter how “beautiful” God has said no.
After Adam and Eve sinned, they hid in the garden. They sewed fig leaves to clothe themselves, for they were ashamed. Here in Eden we have the beginning of defense mechanisms that will be used to control what other people think of us. Fallen man will become guilty of doublethink—that is the ability to believe two contradictory conclusions. He will feel guilty and yet give learned reasons why his actions are justified; though he will not have the motivation to be good, he will give the appearance of being good. He will fight any encroachment of light, and in the process lie to himself, to others and to God.
Lie #3: I’m Entitled to My Own Happiness
Eve turned away from God’s blessings to disobey him. She committed her great sin in the face of great goodness. There were hundreds of trees that she could eat from; only one was forbidden. We’re not even told that they were prohibited from eating of the tree of life; theoretically, they could have eaten and apparently been immortalized as righteous people. There was but one tree, the tree of the “knowledge of good and evil,” from which they were not to eat, “for when you eat of it you shall surely die” (2:17,b).
Surrounded by untold privileges—this was paradise remember—she turned away to do her own thing, to gain her own sense of independence.
Just so, some people do evil within the context of many blessings. Fine homes, vibrant churches, and praying relatives—all this does not prevent the possibility of a child following his untamed desires. We do not have to be raised in bad surroundings to do bad things; we just have to choose to “gratify the cravings of our sinful nature” as Paul put it (Eph. 2:3).
The history of the human race proves this to be so.
Like Adam who was “willingly deceived” we are tempted to do a calculation: will following my passions bring a happiness that will be greater than any distress my actions can bring? Of course, once we have started down that path, our passions will demand immediate gratification, and we will be blind to the consequences. Or we will say, as one person did, “I’ll sin today and deal with the devil tomorrow.” What grieves God is that we are more comfortable with our sin in His presence than we are in the presence of others.
So, Eve did what she thought was best. Perhaps—since she was genuinely deceived—she thought that what was best was also right. If she had doubts, they were brushed aside. God, she thought, had no right to keep her from “fulfillment” but, if He cared He should affirm her every craving. There was a whole new world out there that she wanted to experience.
If you want to make a wise decision, ask: a thousand years from now, what decision will I wish I had made today? No decision can be good in time if it is not good in eternity. This explains why obedience to God is so essential today, because He alone knows tomorrow. We deceive ourselves when we think that only today really matters.
Lie #4: Because God Understands Me, He Overlooks My Indiscretions
We argue that He knows our frame, He remembers that we are dust. Paul warned against self-deception numerous times, particularly about the temptation to let our passions dictate our beliefs. “Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor make prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy or drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers ill inherit the kingdom of God” (I Cor. 6:9,n10 italics added). Since it is true that the mind can rationalize anything that the desires dictate, we should not be surprised that many people blithely assume that they can rewrite God’s commands to satisfy their every craving. They are deceived.
The reason we are forgiven is not because God understands us; we are forgiven because Jesus died for sinners, and thus we have someone who is a substitute in our behalf.
Lie #5: I Am Locked into My Lifestyle Because My Story is Unique
We think that no one has ever been tempted like we are. Yet we read “There is no temptation, but that is common to man….” No matter what you have gone through, someone else has a similar story and has managed to get through it successfully. If you say that your experience is unique and one that you and God can’t handle, you are calling God’s faithfulness into question.
What do we need to end the deceptions?
First, we must be radically honest, willing to be kept from deception no matter the cost. This means not merely honesty in the presence of God, but also honesty in the presence of others. Listen to these words of instruction and warning, “See to it brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness” (Heb.3:12, 13 italics added).
One man put it this way. He says that he had a compartment in his mind that no one—not even God—was allowed to enter. Here in this part of his being, he had room for lust, envy, fear and insecurity. As long as the latch was closed and the walls sealed, he could enter whenever he wished and no one would know. But his heart could not be healed until he admitted that there was no place to hide. God loves to enter our safe places, to pry open the closets of our lives to assess our motives and delights. “Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place” (Psa.51:6).
Second, if we are sensitive to the Holy Spirit, God will convict us through His Word, which is his voice to us. One woman said that when her husband developed an attraction to another woman, though he was a pastor, he left off Bible reading and prayer. It is difficult to even pretend to come into the light when we have something to hide. God wants the misery of our self-deception to be greater than the misery of self-examination and honest confession. He holds us accountable for not desiring Him above all else.
Not for a moment do I suggest that our battle with our passions will subside. The desires of our sensual nature will always conflict with our desire to please God. But we must grow a passion for Christ that is greater than our passion to sin. In fact our willingness to know the truth lies at the heart of our discovery of it. “If anyone chooses to do God’s will, he will find out whether my teaching comes from God or whether I speak on my own” (John 7:17). We often don’t discover the truth for the same reason a thief does not find a policeman. We are not looking for the truth with the same passion as we are looking for reasons to justify ourselves.
There is room for failure in the Christian life; there is no room for accepting failure as a lifestyle. Plenty of time must be given for healing of the soul; but there is no time for taking those small steps in the right direction.
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