The First Commandment with A Promise...

Exodus 20 tells me to "Honor thy father and mother..."

Yesterday was Mother's Day--one of my two least favorite holidays in the whole year. The other "least favorite" will be Father's Day in a few weeks.

My parents abandoned me when I was a small baby, and for all intents and purposes dropped out of my life when it was convenient for them to do so.

My precious Grandmother Hoover raised me--and did one terrific job, if I must say so myself.

We were discussing this very issue in Sunday School yesterday: Honoring your parents.

This has plagued me for a long time. But it seems to have all "come together" yesterday. I don't "honor them" for their sake. I "honor them" for my sake. The promise of God is to me. The promise is that "it will be well with you all the days of your life." That is God's promise to me--for honoring those who "gave birth" to me.

And that's the "hard" part for me. Jodi (my biological mother) and I are friends. Very platonic friends. I'm happy with this arrangement, and it seems to work for me. I'm not sure how it works for her--and for the most part, I've not really cared how it works for her. There is no hatred nor animosity there--but there is a heavy load of indifference, on my part.

So how do I honor someone who abandoned me, and indirectly (sometimes directly) abused me when I needed them most?

What say ye?


Gretchen said...

Well, you honor them by being a good man:-)
Gretchen Lavender

Joe Misek said...

I would imagine that you truly want to honor Grandma Hoover and she could not possibly feel more honored than if you would honor the parents that she stood in place of. I think by consciously trying to grow in your relationship with your parents, you honor Grandma Hoover.

ruthrap said...

I know it is hard to honor parents who weren't that good at parenting..but it will do your heart good to forgive them and love them anyway, Phil ..and it will release a heavy burden..I guarantee you will feel better by just letting go of the resentment. You probably will never forget...but do your best to forgive!