Rescuing the Big 3...

It seems like every "large industry" in the United States now feels entitled to be "rescued" (aka bailed out, resuscitated, etc) by the Congress of the United States of America. Where does the "Congress of the United States of America" get all that money for the various and assorted "rescues" that have taken place recently?

From me. From you. From every taxpayer in this nation....we are the ones "rescuing" all of these "industries" that are you "too big to fail."

But why should we rescue Chrysler, Ford, and General Motors? When the average Chief Executive Officer at the "big 3" make in excess of 20 MILLION dollars each year, why should I rescue their "company"?

I'm very puzzled about this one...truly I am.

It's that time of the year again...

So what plans do you all have for the Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's holidays?

I plan to be "serving" and "hosting" people in my home this year. Our local church is part of an "International Students and Scholars" ministry---people who are living, studying, teaching here in the United States, from other countries. I am inviting several of these wonderful people to my home for each of the holidays.

I want them to feel 'at home' and part of all the activities here in the United States while they are here.

I remember, very well, what it was like to live in other countries during those holiday seasons, and not knowing what to do, or where I would go.

So what are you doing for this holiday season?

Thank you, Attorney General Cuomo!

ALBANY, N.Y. (AP) -- New York Attorney General Andrew Cuomo says Citigroup executives should forgo their bonuses this year after the company announced massive layoffs.
Calling the layoffs of 53,000 people "disturbing," Cuomo says top executives shouldn't get bonuses while investors, taxpayers and employees suffer.

Cuomo adds that other companies should consider doing the same, including American International Group, which has received billions of federal bailout dollars.

In October, Cuomo's office asked nine banks to turn over information on bonuses. He wants to ensure none of the $125 billion the banks received from the government's Troubled Asset Relief Program will be used on executive pay.

Goldman Sachs Group announced Sunday its top executives won't get bonuses this year.
From me:

The bonuses that these "executives" have received over the last many years are vile, and horrendous. While many, many employees are laid-off (many with families to clothe and feed), these "high-powered people" often leave with Hundreds of millions of dollars in bonuses, stock options, etc.

It has never sat well with me. We are indeed the laughingstock of the world when we treat our work force with such disdain and disregard. Look at the airline industry. United Airlines went bankrupt, and their top CEO left the company with a huge bonus.

For what??????

The tired, old excuse of "we have to attract and retain good talent in those spots" is nothing more than old and tired. It's also untrue.

Thank you, Attorney General Cuomo for serving the people of the Great State of New York with such integrity and care. You do this nation proud.

The Colonoscopy: A First-hand account...

Someone wrote this wonderful "account" about a colonoscopy. This was SO funny, I just had to share it here:


I left the docs office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. (I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America 's enemies).

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous. Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor. Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep.

You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons.) Then you have to drink the whole jug.. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result.' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but: Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep. The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on the Doc?' How do you apologize to someone for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked.

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep. (At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house).

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where the Doc was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew they had it hidden around there somewhere.. I was seriously nervous at this point.

They had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand. There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate.

'You want me to turn it up?' said the Doc, from somewhere behind me.. 'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea.
I slept through it.

One moment, ABBA was yelling 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood. The Doc was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when he told me that It was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.

Man Rules...I repeat myself...

These are so good...and so funny, that I had to "re-post" them. My great friend, Pastor Travis Johnson (Florida) sent these to me a couple of years ago....I repost them here:

1. Men ARE not mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be..

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done, not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothings wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

So, what say ye?

Congratulation, President-Elect Obama!

Mr President-Elect,

While I did not vote for you to move into 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, I have always admired you. I did vote for you to become our United States Senator in 2004.

You have genuinely won the affection of many, many Americans, and I congratulate you for that marvelous accomplishment. You have instilled hope and good will in people who have often seemed hopeless and forsaken. Again, I commend you for these actions.

However, I am concerned. As you so wonderfully stated last night, some of these mountains will not be easily conquered. I fear that far too many people have looked to you as their "Messiah" without realizing that you, too, are only human, even though this is something that you have readily admitted on more than one occasion.

You are only one year older than myself. Please know that I admire you, and will be praying for you every day. Please surround yourself with people who have the nation's best interest at heart. Please keep your family your very first priority--making them a wonderful example to so many who live in dysfuntion when they really have other choices.

Please find yourself a great church where you can worship God, and get to know Him better. Other presidents have regularly attended church while occuppying the White House. I'm encouraging you to do so, as well.

You've made alot of promises to a lot of people. Now you will be expected to start keeping those promises....Be a man of your word.

The world is watching you. You now represent not a "white America" or a "Black America"--but the United States of America.

God bless you.

Madelyn Dunham--Senator Obama's Grandmother has died...

What a sad time this must be for Senator Barack Obama.

At 86 years old, Madelyn Dunham went into eternity today. She died of cancer this morning. She was largely responsible for raising this great man into the person he has largely become.

While I will not be casting my one vote for Senator Obama to be our next President, I can't help but sympathize and feel his grief in this time of loss.

My Grandmother Hoover left this world almost 17 years ago. I miss her more every day. I often feel her absence very keenly.

Regardless of how one feels about Senator Obama's politics, let's make sure that we pray for him, and his family in this incredible time of loss.

The "liberal media"...not buying it...

I have heard so many so-called "conservatives" blame the "liberal media" for the point of nausea, on my part.

I'm just not buying it. I never have...and I probably never will.

Now, I'm not the gullible one who believes everything that is reported on the television, radio, internet, or otherwise.

But I refuse to blame the "liberal media" for everything in our society.

Most of these men and women (with some glaring exceptions) are honorable people who simply want to "report the news."

I know, I know...EVERYONE has a bias. Even the "conservative" hounds who insist that everything (that doesn't go their way) is the fault of the "liberal media."

Come on, folks: GROW UP!

Do some of your own research. Try to see more than just "one side" of whatever issue happens to be the "hot one" at the time.

I'm just not buying the whole "blame the liberal media" diatribe...

Of this much, I am certain...

I know that my Redeemer lives,
O the sweet joy this sentence gives.
He lives, He lives, who once was dead.
He lives, my Everlasting Head.

He lives triumphant from the grave.
He lives eternally to save.
He lives exalted, throned above
He lives to rule His church in love.

He lives to bless me with His love,
And still He pleads for me above.
He lives my hungry soul to feed.
He lives to help in time of need.

He lives, my kind, wise, constant friend.
Who still will keep me to the end.
He lives, and while He lives I'll sing
Jesus, my Prophet, Priest, and King!

He lives, all glory to His Name;
He lives, my Saviour, still the same.
What joy the blest assurance gives!
I know that my Redeemer lives!
Text by Samuel Medley, tune "Duke Street".

Of this much we can be certain, our Redeemer lives! When all around us is uncertain, unsure, and unsteady, we can know that our certain, sure, and steady Lord is still alive, and in control. Yes, I know that my Redeemer lives!