Why the struggle?

I remember a famous musical artist in the "contemporary Christian" field who had some terrible "moral problems" more than a dozen years ago...

When she finally came "clean"...she said, "I just want to stand free and clean before the Lord, and His people..."

What a feeling! I want to always stand "free and clean before the Lord and His people..."

But sometimes there is tremendous fear...not from God, but from His people. And that's sad...

When we fear "God's people" more than we fear God Himself.

Right now...actually, for the last several months, I've been having an intense internal struggle...and haven't felt that I could share it with anyone...because of the fear that grips my soul.

Fear of:

Rejection
Isolation
Abandonment
Exposure.

Why such fear?

3 comments:

Kevin Bussey said...

Praying for you today.

Also, I haven't forgot about the book. I can't drive to the post office on the scooter. So it has to be when I'm in the car. I hope to get there this week.

joany louise said...

Hey Phil, from time to time I think we all go through those times of personal struggle. I know I do, but Praise be to God He always brings me through and He will do the same for you. So hang in there my brother! This scripture comes to mind.
(ISV) No temptation has overtaken you that is unusual for human beings. But God is faithful, and he will not allow you to be tempted beyond your strength. Instead, along with the temptation he will also provide a way out, so that you may be able to endure it.
God Bless...Joany

M. Steve Heartsill said...

My Alabama brother...I'm praying for you!

I think you know why the fear! I, like you, have rarely shared inner struggles, not for fear of God--He knows those already. But, because of what others will say, do, feel, and as a minister--how they will employ or not employ me!

That fear is real, and confirmed too often in the world in which we find ourselves...

We don't "love on" the injured, we drive the knife a little deeper.